During this last winter (from which we in England are just emerging) I rediscovered the joys of Daytime Television. As the daylight disappeared (at around 4 oclock) I would emerge from my study, make a cup of tea and sit down alongside Heather, my wife, who would probably be watching one of those Property programmes - she's a great one for looking at nice, big houses. I would accept her invitation to search for something more interesting and almost inevitably find that I would come upon an episode of 'Yes, Minister'. And we would watch it. And we would find it most entertaining. And we would find it as horrifyingly appropriate to our times as we did when first we watched all those years ago.
Last week - that would be the week ending 12 March 2010 - the Spectator magazine published a supplement called 'A Manifesto - How To Save Britain in Ten Easy Steps'. Within in it was an article by Sir Antony Jay, the co-author of 'Yes, Minister', about the ways in which the senior civil servants, often called the 'mandarins', can thwart the intentions of what they ironically like to call their 'political masters'. Apart from the article itself, which I would commend to you, he offers us a list of 'techniques and strategies' that the mandarins employ to frustrate unwelcome initiatives. 'Unwelcome' can be taken to mean anything that disturbs the even tenure of their lives. Here is the list. Read it and laugh - and then weep because it's true.
1. Fixing key meeting at awkward times and reassuring ministers that they don't need to be there.
2. Saying people were unable to attend when they had never actually been asked.
3. Suppressing reports that conflicted with departmental advice or challenged departmental policy.
4. Falsely claiming that undesirable actions were prohibited by statute, or that desirable ones were demanded.
5. Leaving political advisers off circulation lists of sensitive documents (on imaginary 'security' grounds.
6. Reporting objections from people or organisations who do not actually object at all.
7. Subtly altering instructions and agreements when writing manuals and reports.
8. Setting up interdepartmental committees to examine controversial proposals.
9. Wide circulation of proposals for comment and suggestion (never chased up for a response).
10. Sending ministers around the country, indeed the world, for ceremonial reasons to represent the department or the government.
A stage version of 'Yes, Prime Minister' opens at the Chichester Festival on 13 May.
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